The original statement of Dan’s approach, which some therapists say remains their favorite among his three books. Critiques the psychodynamic, behavioral, and systems approaches. Points out that many of the theories and concepts in our field are pathology-oriented and presents a nonpathologizing alternative.
“Among the best things I have read in years. Absolutely superb. Will instantly become standard reading for all my students and key materials for me to study over and over. Wile’s book is just beautiful, in the very top rank of anything being written about psychotherapy today and deserves the widest possible audience.”
—- Paul Wachtel, Ph.D., author of Psychoanalysis and Behavior Therapy
AFTER THE HONEYMOON
HOW CONFLICT CAN IMPROVE YOUR RELATIONSHIP. Revised Edition. (2008). Oakland: Collaborative Couple Therapy Books. Written for the general public but also useful for therapists. Available from Amazon and Barnes & Noble (The one dated 2008 is the revised edition).
“This book by Dan Wile is a classic, now revised to offer couples even more insight into how to turn the maze of everyday conversations into a fascinating path that leads towards ever more intimacy and relationship satisfaction. Not only that, it is just plain fun to read!”
—- Sue Johnson, University of Ottawa and author of Hold Me Tight: Seven Conversations for a Lifetime of Love
AFTER THE FIGHT
USING YOUR DISAGREEMENTS TO BUILD A STRONGER RELATIONSHIP. (1993). New York: Guilford Press. You can order directly from Guilford (800) 365-7006 or www.guilford.com, www.amazon.com and www.barnesandnoble.com.
Built around a fight a couple has one evening and their therapy session the next day – with emphasis on the moment-to-moment inner dialogue of each partner. Constructed on the premise that any small piece of conflictual couple behavior contains within it the main problematic issues in all relationships. The therapist’s own inner dialogue is described, bringing out feelings therapists rarely reveal.
“An inspirational book. It is one of the most unique and creative books about couples I have ever read. It captures not only the subtleties of couple interactions, but also the nuances of couple therapy. I plan to assign this book to all of my graduate students, and will open it myself whenever I need to be reminded of how exciting it is to study and treat couples.”
—-Neil Jacobson, Ph.D., University of Washington
“I am re-reading After the Fight and I think it is a wonderful book. Just really terrific. I think that the great strength of the book is the way it helps the clinician puzzle through the day-to-day workings of therapy”
—-John Gottman, Ph.D., University of Washington