Turning Fights into Conversations and Problems into Opportunities for Intimacy
This weekend workshop for couples is led by a couple (Dan Wile and Dorothy Kaufmann) and will be given in Oakland, CA on October 14-15, 2017 and again in the spring of 2018. In our workshop, we teach what we’ve learned over the forty year history of Collaborative Couple Therapy about how to have an engaged and fulfilling relationship. The heart of the weekend is experiential exercises you do privately with your partner. Dan and Dorothy help each couple as needed. LGBTQ friendly.
The workshop will take place in our home in the upper Rockridge area of Oakland. Fee is $750 per couple ($700 early bird if mailed by Sept 2, 2017) for the two days (9:30am to 4:30pm each day). Lunch will be provided. For more information contact Dorothy: email or 510-597-1248. To register, please fill out the form below and send it with your check to Dorothy Kaufmann, 6119 Acacia Avenue, Oakland, CA 94618.
A couple problem is really two problems: (1) the problem itself (money, sex, children) and (2) how partners talk or don’t talk about it.
The quality of life in a relationship depends on our ability to recover from the inevitable periods of fighting or withdrawing; that is, from turning each other into enemies or strangers. At a minimum, we want to keep such fighting and withdrawing from destroying the relationship. But it is possible to turn these hazards into means for deepening the relationship by conducting a recovery conversation. In such a conversation, we go over the fight or withdrawal we were just in, but with appreciation for each partner’s struggle and recognition that each partner’s position makes sense. In an optimally functioning couple, fighting and withdrawing become opportunities for intimacy.
We show how to create a reservoir of good will and a perspective from which partners can jointly guide the relationship.
Comments by Past Participants about the Couples Workshop
- Excellent! The leaders were wonderful, very knowledgeable, and collaborated well together.
- What I liked best was the tools to help me think more about my words during conflict.
- I am very grateful for this weekend. Dorothy is a sweet lady!
- The packets are great – very well written and organized. I really also loved the exercises between my partner and me.
- The gift of having the weekend learning from you two is so inspiring.
- I found that every private session (10 minutes or more of couples only conversation) yielded something new about my partner that I didn’t know before. And this enhanced my curiosity about and empathy for him. I also learned new things about myself and was reminded of other important things about us as a couple.
- The Sunday afternoon recovery conversation and the gentle, curious questions and supportive inquiring to expand on the experience were wonderful. I loved the positive “reservoir of good will” building and the Recovery Conversations.
- It was a huge beautiful turning point for both of us.
- The tag team between you two was very enlightening; seeing your dynamic together really meant something to my husband and me.
- Especially useful was hearing about how Dan and Dorothy navigate their own struggles.
- The tone and rhythm of Dorothy and Dan was very comforting and created a sense of safety.
- Amazing!! Best workshop I’ve ever attended. Well-paced, great exercises, expert facilitators.
- Loved your energy together.
Daniel Wile, PhD, is a couple therapist in private practice in Oakland, CA, has published three books (Couples Therapy, After the Honeymoon, and After the Fight) and numerous articles on couples, and gives professional workshops nationally and internationally.
Dorothy Kaufmann, MFT (Marriage and Family Therapist), in private practice in Oakland, works with couples and individuals. In her previous life, PhD literature, she taught and wrote in the humanities, a career she sees as continuous with her present vocation.
Dan and Dorothy also do therapy together, seeing couples who would like to work with a couple.
This workshop offers 12 CE units for California psychologists, LCSWS, MFTs, and LPCCs. Collaborative Couple Therapy Seminars is approved by the California Psychological Association (CPA) to provide continuing professional education for psychologists. The California Board of Behavioral Sciences (BBS) now accepts CPA continuing education credit for license renewal for LCSWs, MFTs, and LPCCs. Collaborative Couple Therapy Seminars maintains responsibility for this program and its contents.
See registration form below:
REGISTRATION FORM FOR COUPLES WORKSHOP
Please type or print clearly
Mail to Dorothy Kaufmann, 6119 Acacia Avenue, Oakland, CA 94618
Names ______________________________ _______________________________
Phones _____________________________ _______________________________
Emails ______________________________ _______________________________
State ________________ Zip __________
Second address if living separately __________________________________________
How did you hear about our workshop?_______________________________________
Workshop will be on Oct 14-15, 2017: the next one will be in the spring of 2018. 9:30am to 4:30pm on each day. $750 for the two days ($700 early bird rate if postmarked by Sept 2, 2017).
If interested in CE units
Name __________________ License type__________ License#__________ State ____
Anything else you’d like us to know: